Disclaimer: I am only dipping my pen in George's inkwell. No credits, Republic or otherwise, have been exchanged.

Letting Go

Part Six

 

Dru paced the confines of his ship. He felt like insanity was assaulting him at every turn. This was some dream he couldn't seem to wake up from. The woman he was starting to love was a Jedi. He could handle that. But Reega accused her of being this same Jedi he'd met 40 years ago. And Alee didn't deny it. But she never denies anything. She just clams up. She can't be that Jedi; she'd have to been frozen in time for well over 30 years. That's crazy. It's not logical.

Dru abruptly halted his pacing. That would make the Qui-Gon that died on Naboo her Qui-Gon. That would certainly explain her reactions. He ran his fingers through his hair. No way. There has to be a reasonable explanation for all this. Reega's got some loose wires and Alee did what she did to save me. He sighed over the way she seemed to attract beings that wanted to kill her. Were all Jedi like that? Or does she have a special gift?

A thought wormed its way into his consciousness: I wonder if I can get hold of those holo tapes that Reega mentioned. Emperor's bones, this is driving me crazy! Dru spun and slammed his palm against the bulkhead. And again.

"You called me here to watch you tear apart your precious rust heap?"

Druce jumped. "Blast it, Mara. I hate it when you sneak up on a guy like that."

"But I do so love to watch you jump, Nardo," the young red-headed woman said.

"I've noticed. When I put a call out to Booster for help, I didn't expect to get his security specialist. What has you soaking up the mists on Umgul?"

"Security."

"Warehouse problems?" Dru asked.

Mara Jade crossed her arms and gave him a doubtful stare.

"Okay. Okay. It's none of my business. I really don't want to know what Booster's smuggling these days, anyway."

Sinking into a chair, Mara said, "By the way, I'm supposed to extend Booster's offer for you to return to the organization. Good slicers are hard to come by. He was thrilled to hear from you."

Dru perched across from her. "No thanks. It was a great place to get experience, but I enjoy my independence too much."

"What do you need help with, Nardo? I'm on a schedule."

Druce tapped the edge of the table. He envied the way Mara was able to strike a pose of perfect stillness. Like a predator watching its prey. He suppressed a shiver. She was dangerous. But she was also perfect for what he had in mind.

"I need to mount a rescue operation."

Mara's eyes narrowed slightly. "Anyone in particular?"

Dru nodded and stared at his tapping fingers.

Mara leaned forward. "Ah. Someone who means a great deal to you. This is suddenly very interesting. The original keep-'em-at-arms-length artist has been jarred out of complacency - so much so that he's willing to spring into action to save her. I'd like to meet this woman."

"I'm not sure I want her to meet you," muttered Druce.

"Well, then. I guess I'll be leaving." Mara stood and turned away.

"Mara, get back here. Please."

The smugly smiling woman sat back down. Dru ran his fingers through his hair and looked at her with bleak, stormy blue eyes.

"Did you find out if Reega and company are still at the track?" Dru asked.

Suddenly, Mara was all business. "Yes. I have a sentry posted. We'll know if they move. What are you doing messing with Hutts, Nardo?"

"Long story."

"Why is Reega holding your ... friend ... prisoner?"

"Longer story."

"No problem. I'll find out someday." A passing smile flitted across her features. "Describe the layout, guards, whatever you can."

While Dru told Mara everything he could remember, she sat back, eyes closed, as if she were transforming his words into pictures. Occasionally she nodded or asked for clarification. When he had finished, Mara's green-eyed gaze met his.

"Both entrances will be guarded. The way you and Alee entered - that's what you called her? - is the perfect place to stage a distraction," Mara said.

"Oh, I can give you that, Mara. But it might be very loud - and very messy," Dru replied.

Mara waited for him to continue.

"You see," Dru said, "I never appreciated being boxed into working for a Hutt. So I, well, I booby-trapped the computer. Don't know why. It gave me some sort of perverse pleasure. Never figured it would come in handy."

Mara stared at him. "The computer's a bomb?"

"Only if I enter the right codes, in the right sequence."

"Remote trigger?"

"Or on site. Works either way."

Mara chuckled. "Didn't think you had it in you, Nardo."

"I am so tired of being underestimated by the women in my life," mumbled Dru.

"Got yourself a feisty one, did you?"

Dru stared at her for a moment. "Let's get going, Mara. You're on a schedule."

"Right. The darkness and mist will work in our favor, so change into something black and we'll get going."

Druce came out of the refresher to find Mara holding Alee's cloak as she ran her fingers over the strange lettering. Her eyes were filled with curiosity.

He worked to keep the anger out of his voice. "Don't go there, Mara. Alee is a very private person and I'm respecting that."

"I didn't say a thing, Nardo. Let's go." She tossed the cloak over the back of the chair and strode towards the ship's exit.

Dru could feel the wet air soaking through his clothing and beading on his skin. He sat on the roof overlooking the main door to Reega's trackside suite. He bent over his portable console, trying to protect it from the moisture as he sliced his way into the computer across the street. He punched the air in victory when he got in. He checked his chrono. Seven minutes left. He wondered what Mara was cooking up. She should be back by now. He returned his attention to the task at hand and entered the self-destruct codes. Five minutes.

Druce put his unit into his backpack and slipped it on. He slipped his blaster out of its holster and flipped off the safety. He patted the holdout in his boot and the vibroblade concealed in his belt. Three minutes. At least Mara wasn't leaving him time to get nervous. So where was she?

A tap on his shoulder. Dru jumped. He spun around and Mara clapped her hand over his mouth. He pulled it down and shot her an angry look.

"Stop doing that," he whispered.

She pointed her thumb over her shoulder. "Time to descend."

Mara led the way to a waiting ascension rope and clipped her belt hook to it. She stepped over the edge and disappeared. Dru glanced at his chrono. 90 seconds. He followed Mara over the edge and the sensors in his belt clip brought him to a halt as his feet touched the ground. Mara was waiting for him by the corner of the building.

"What did you set up?" he whispered.

"The far door will explode about five seconds before your computer," Mara replied.

"What about the guard?"

"Dealt with already."

Mara held up three black-gloved fingers. Two. One. She smiled as a distant thud sounded through the misty blackness. The second explosion was muffled by the rock. It lured the two guards inside.

"Perfect," whispered Mara. She slapped something into Dru's hand. "Get this breather on. It'll protect you from the dust and allow you to see infrared."

"Where do you get these toys?" Dru muttered as they sprinted across the street.

The two flanked the door and slipped the masks over blackened faces. At Mara's touch the door flashed open and they stepped into the foyer. The two side sentry alcoves were empty. The Grans from outside were standing halfway down the hall, bobbing their heads to see into the room beyond. When the door opened, they turned, only to be met by twin laser fire before they could shout their alarm.

The invaders advanced, each hugging a wall. As they stepped over the guards' bodies, Dru nudged a foot with his boot. It had been a long time since he'd had to kill anything.

The dust-choked room beyond was empty. Beyond that was the race viewing room. It was partially collapsed. A half dozen beings, infrared silhouettes, were in the room, shouting, coughing, scrambling to free others trapped beneath the rubble. Mara motioned Druce forward.

He dashed across the room and pressed himself against the stone. When nothing happened he fingered the controls and the double doors closed with a thud. He activated the lock as someone started banging on the other side.

A shout from behind made Dru spin and crouch. Several figures were spilling through a side doorway. The dusty air sizzled with flashes of red as Mara exchanged fire with them. Dru aimed his blaster and dropped the second being. The others scrambled for cover. When laser bolts skimmed past his nose he realized he was completely exposed.

Dru dived for a chair in the corner to his right. Heat sliced his left thigh. He hit the floor and rolled behind the small repulsor chair. He leaned against it and pressed his hand to his wound. Flesh wound. Dru peeked around the chair and fired three bolts. A man crumpled. He kept his weapon aimed at the door and slowly rose to his feet, wincing when he put his weight on his left leg.

Druce limped toward Mara. He stopped in the middle of the room and scanned the hallway that had spewed their attackers. Empty.

A roar split the air. Dru pivoted on his heel to see Reega undulating toward him at incredible speed. Dru blinked. He's going to run me over. He raised his blaster and fired. The Hutt kept coming. He fired again. Then again. The Hutt finally slowed to a halt and seemed to melt into a formless pile of bantha dung.

Dru's hand shook as he kept the Hutt in his sights. A black glove encircled his wrist and pushed his arm down.

"He's dead, Nardo," Mara said, her voice nasal behind the mask. "Your girlfriend is somewhere down that corridor. Go find her. I'll stay here and cover you."

Druce nodded and pulled off his breather. He stepped over the Hutt's tail into the previously concealed hallway and moved forward with his back against the wall. The first doorway revealed the Hutt's private quarters. Dru's nostrils flared at the smell assaulting him as he slipped past.

Storage. Storage. Storage. Locked. Dru slipped his pack to the floor and rotated his shoulders. Rolling across the floor had imprinted the pack's contents into his back and it throbbed with an insistent ache. Refusing to acknowledge the pain, he squatted and set to work picking the lock. A click and hiss signaled his success. Dru stood and palmed the door trigger. It slid into the wall.

Dru flicked on the lights and stared. Alee lay unmoving in the middle of the floor. His body froze as panic swept through his mind and his heart lodged in his throat, restricting his breathing. Loud wheezing filled the room. His, he realized.

His limbs thawed and Dru rushed over, dropping to his knees beside Alee. He gaped at the angry gash on her back, not bleeding, but oozing a sickly yellow pus. Infected. Enough to kill her? Dru searched for a pulse and put his cheek up against her nose, hoping for a whiff of air. He bit his lip and repeated his actions. He thought, maybe, just maybe, there was the faintest pulse. Was she dying? He cradled her gently and pressed his lips to her forehead. Please be okay, Alee. Anger pushed through his thoughts. Don't you dare die on me, Alee. Not now.

"Jedi hibernation trance," Mara said as she crouched beside Dru.

The slicer looked at Mara and blinked. "What?"

"She's not dead. Under repair would be a better description. Life functions are reduced to a minimum so that the body can deal with a stressful situation," explained Mara. "In this case, that infected wound."

Dru stared at her. "How would you know something like that?"

A slight smirk curled Mara's lip. "You'd be surprised what I know, Nardo." She paused. "Your girlfriend's state certainly explains this."

Mara held out Alee's lightsaber.

"Where ...?" Dru began.

"Around the Hutt's neck. Guess you were too preoccupied to notice it."

Druce took the weapon and tucked it inside his tunic. He brushed his fingertips across Alee's forehead, then returned his attention to Mara Jade to find her eyeing him through narrow slits.

"Will she be okay?" Dru asked.

"Yes. Though she could be in that trance for days," Mara replied. "I don't like this, Nardo. You have a Jedi on your hands, though where she came from is beyond me. But that doesn't change the fact that you're dealing with a dangerous and unpredictable creature. Might be better if she didn't survive this."

"Don't even think it," Dru snapped. "Alee isn't a creature, Mara. She's a woman. And she's my friend. She isn't dangerous to anyone, except, maybe, herself."

"Are you absolutely sure, Nardo?" Mara pressed.

"Every fiber in my being says so, Mara. I trust my instincts and I trust Alee. I'd stake my life on it." Have already.

Mara studied his face for a minute. She shrugged. "It's your life, Nardo. I hope you don't end up regretting this." She stood and looked down at Druce. "But, keep her away from me. I'd hate to have to do what the Hutt failed to."

Dru frowned. "What's your problem? Why do you seem to hate Alee so much?"

Mara sneered. "She's a Jedi." With that, she wheeled around and disappeared.

Dru studied Alee's face. What kind of an answer is that? What is it about the Jedi that brings out such hate? Get better soon, Alee. We have to talk.

*

The ship infused Alee's every sense, its cool air alive with the humming vibration that signalled a hyperspace flight. Am I headed for Imperial space? Something soft and familiar brushed her cheek. My cloak. Then I have to be on Dru's ship. But how?

Alee forced her eyes open. Suddenly Dru's face appeared, centimeters from her own. His fingers caressed her cheek and he smiled, his blue eyes snapping.

"Welcome back," he whispered.

"You saved me," she croaked.

"It's what a friend would do."

"But, how?" she asked.

"I had a little help. I'm not without resources."

"Reega?"

Dru shrugged. "Had to kill him, I'm afraid."

Alee felt unreasonable relief rush through her veins. She tried to summon compassion, but the thought of Keedad blocked it. Sometimes justice is done, even without her help. That was one Hutt who wouldn't be telling her secret, or hurting any other innocents.

"You still look tired," Dru said. "Maybe you should sleep a little more. But try not to snore this time. You sounded like a tribe of Tuskan Raiders."

Alee glared at him. "I do not snore. Besides, I wasn't sleeping, so how could I have been snoring? Go tease your computer, Dru. Maybe darling VAL will appreciate your pathetic sense of humor."

Dru cupped her jaw in his hand. His voice was soft. "There's no fooling a Jedi, is there? Rest, Alee. We need to talk."

Alee stifled a yawn. "Talk, talk, talk. That's all you ever want to do."

As her eyes drifted shut, she heard him whisper, "Oh, I want to do more than that, sweet Jedi. Much more."

Alee thought she felt his lips brush hers. Then darkness descended.

Energy tingled along her nerves and into her fingertips. Alee stretched and opened her eyes to stare at the bed above her. Sleep had invigorated her, just as the Jedi trance had healed her. A sound of contentment escaped her lips.

Druce's head popped into view, past the ledge of the top bunk. A smile crinkled the corners of his eyes. Deep blue and sparkling eyes. She smiled back. So like Qui-Gon's. But not.

"Feeling better? You look better," Dru said.

Alee raised a brow. "Thanks, I think. And yes, I feel better."

Dru hopped down and leaned over her, bracing himself against the bunk. "Great. Now we can..."

"Eat," interrupted Alee.

A look of innocence appeared on the slicer's face. "That's what I was going to say."

Alee snorted. "Right."

As soon as the plate was set before her, the Jedi turned ravenous. She knew Druce was watching her with barely concealed amusement, but she didn't care. Finally, she pushed the plate away and sat back with her cup of caf in hand. Let the interrogation begin.

Alee sat, silently sipping her hot drink, waiting for Druce to speak.

He cleared his throat. "There's something I need to know, Alee. Well, there are lots of things I need to know, but this one thing is driving me to distraction."

Expectation settled on her features. Here we go.

"How much do I look like your Qui-Gon?" Alee stared at him, dumbfounded. He turned to the side and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, and looked askance at her. Entreatment filled his eyes and he said, "Please, Alee. I need to know."

Alee set her cup down and slid to her knees in front of Druce. He lowered his head. Alee tilted it back up and captured his gaze with her own.

"I don't see him in your eyes anymore, Dru. Something has changed - it must have been the saying good-bye. I only see you: Druce Nardo, ace slicer and rescuer of imprisoned women." She put a teasing note into her voice.

He smiled weakly. "Please. Am I his spitting image? Will I always remind you of him, even if you claim otherwise?"

Alee felt the pain in his entreaty. This was obviously of great concern to him. But why? She squinted her eyes slightly and ran her fingers over his brow.

"Your forehead isn't as high." She teased his hair. "His hair was brown and a fair bit longer. He always kept it pulled back from his face, where you let it hang down at times." She blinked. "Your eyes are the same, but different emotions flash through them." Her fingers traced his nose and stopped just below the tip. "You have no bump." One fingertip traced his lips. "Your lips are a little thicker, but just as firm." Her hand cupped his jaw. "He had a beard and you have a cleft in your chin." She smiled. "No, Dru. You are not his spitting image."

Concern still etched his features. "But we're the same height?"

"Within a centimeter, yes. But you are narrower in the hips. Though that could be an age difference."

"How old was he?"

"He was almost 60 to my 30."

"That's quite an age spread," he commented.

Alee closed her eyes. "I suppose. But age matters not. Not when there is love."

"And he was a Jedi," Dru stated.

"Yes."

"Do Jedi only love other Jedi?"

A frown creased her brow. "No. Our mutual Force connection allowed for a deeper level of understanding and ... and bonding. But it didn't define our love - it only enhanced it. Why?"

Dru shrugged. "Why didn't you try to escape from Reega?"

Alee sat back on her heels and adjusted to the abrupt change in questioning. After a small pause, she said, "I gave him my word I wouldn't."

"A word so strong even a Hutt trusts it."

"Only in death can a Jedi break her promise. Though I was hoping for rescue, even if I doubted it would come. And I never promised him I wouldn't assist any rescuers that might turn up. But then I had to fight the infection." Alee's thoughts drifted back to her imprisonment. "The creature that gave me that gash was infected by some disease. Perhaps the virus that struck those Umgullian blobs. It entered my bloodstream and was attacking my heart." She refocused on Druce. "I'm sorry I wasn't conscious to welcome you, my rescuer. I would have relished the chance to see you in action at something other than a computer console. Mind you, you're very good at that. Your splicing skills saved me on Naboo."

Dru studied her face. "Why did you escape on Naboo, but not Umgul?"

"On Naboo, I gave my word that I would go peacefully with the guards. I never said anything about escape."

"You're very legalistic."

"When it suits."

"Always looking for a loophole?" Dru teased.

"You'd be surprised how often there is one," Alee replied.

"But not on Umgul."

"Don't worry. I would've attempted escape - from whomever the Hutt shipped me to. I appreciate you going through the trouble to save me from that option."

"It was no trouble. Why would you think I wasn't coming? Why would you doubt me?" Dru asked. Alee sensed anger tinging his hurt.

Alee sighed. "You were so confused, so, so angry when the Hutt was questioning me. I thought you might have had enough of this particular Jedi."

"Of course I was angry. I've done nothing but trust you, yet the only time I learn anything about you is when some enemy or the other is interrogating you." Indignation was seeping into his words. "Then Reega starts hurling outlandish accusations at you and you clam up. Refuse to refute anything he says. Make him think its true. Why?"

Alee felt sadness lapping at her mind as she watched Druce. The Force was demanding she speak. She could feel it.

"You're doing it again," Dru said through clenched teeth. "Do you expect me to believe that nonsense? That you've been frozen for 30 years. That you're the same Jedi he clashed with on some nothing planet close to 40 years ago."

Alee blinked back tears. "Keedad. It was on Keedad. The Keed weren't nothing. They were my friends."

Dru stared at her. "You're kidding right?" He grabbed her by the shoulders. "Right?"

When she only shook her head, he released her with a sound of disgust and stood. "You're crazy. This whole thing is crazy. You can't expect me to believe that. It's not logical."

Alee fought the growing frustration in her. She leapt to her feet and spun Druce around to face her. She poked him in the chest. He scowled at her.

"I can't give you logic, Dru," Alee said. "I can only give you truth. That's what you said you've always wanted from me, so now you've got it. You want me to trust you. Okay." She struggled for calm, but her words were laced with ire. "The Force help me, but the truth is: you can't handle the truth. The galaxy we live in is not always logical or sensible or fair or just. I'm sorry if you can't believe it, but I am the Jedi that chased Reega off Keedad. My past already was before you were a year old. My future was stolen from me by a ... a freak of nature. And here I am. All I have is this moment, Dru. All I have is a lifetime of bleak, lonely moments."

"What about your boyfriend-to-be," Dru sneered. "You know - the promised one."

Desolate misery draped over Alee. "Won't happen. I'm a freak, Dru. I revolt you. I would revolt anyone. I don't belong in this time." She wiped dampness off her cheek. "Sometimes I want to go back so bad, the desire suffocates me, makes it impossible to breath. But I can't return. Forward only flows the Force. That's what Master Yoda said. Some days it feels like death is my only release. But the Force won't let me become one with it - not yet. Why is it keeping me tied to this time? For some love that will never be? My friends are all dead. Qui-Gon is dead. If I hadn't been thrown into this time, I'd be dead. I belong there. I belong then." She trailed off.

"The Jedi who died in that power station on Naboo was your Qui-Gon?" Dru asked quietly.

Alee sniffed and looked away. "Who else would he be? There was only one Qui-Gon Jinn. A Jedi warrior of unsurpassed abilities. A proud and noble man, filled with compassion, connected to the Living Force in a way I strive to emulate."

"But he must have been surpassed. He was struck down."

Alee glared at Druce. "His body was defeated, but not his being. It matters not how strong in the Force you may be, a Jedi cannot escape death. It is the one universal experience." Melancholy overtook her thoughts. "Some relish it more than others. I often wonder how many Jedi simply laid down their lightsabers and chose death over fighting the emerging Empire. It haunts me - the thought that we might have prevented this terrible future if we had stood firm. I feel so, so guilty."

"For what?"

"I don't know. For surviving. For escaping my fate. For letting the memories of the Republic fade even the tiniest bit." She sighed. "I'm a museum piece. A living, breathing Jedi Holocron, with no one to pass my knowledge to."

"What about Luke Skywalker?"

She started and met his curious gaze. "No. Master Yoda forbade our meeting. I honor him by obedience. I defied the Council often enough in my day, but I will not do so in this case. He must have had his reasons."

Druce rubbed his eyes and massaged his temples. "You said you were 34 years old."

"I have lived 34 standard years, with a 32-year break that happened four years ago. I don't lie, Druce. You should know that, by know."

"What I know is that you deliberately leave out a lot of truth," His tone was curt. "I want to believe you, Alee. But, ..."

"I know," she said quietly. "You can't. It's not logical. The only thing I can bring this friendship is truth, and I do promise not to deceive you again. The promise of a Jedi. I choose to trust you with my story, Dru. I hope you will honor my request not to share that story. Though, I understand if you want nothing more to do with me."

Alee turned with a heavy heart and returned to sit cross-legged on the lower bunk. She draped her cloak over her knees and brushed at it absently. She had placed her fate in the hands of a man who didn't believe her past, had grave doubts about her present, and was the key to her future - this fascinating, frustrating man she was coming to love. Druce was the one. She could feel it. But if he chose not to walk the path the Living Force was leading them to, all her moments would be bleak indeed.

She closed her eyes and focused inwards to chase after her elusive center of calm. Each time she drew near, it was consumed by a swirling, color-shot vortex - like the one that had swallowed her life. Was it about to swallow her future? Qui-Gon would tell me to trust my instincts, to follow the Living Force. I need to trust. The Force's leading. Druce. But what are his instincts telling him? Will he listen? Force help me. I feel so alone.

*****